Feeling Triggered on a Date?
Most people feel like something is wrong when they get triggered in dating. You start to overthink. You shut down. You feel anxious. You try to play it cool when your insides are freaking out or your mind starts racing. Or you start second-guessing yourself, trying to figure out what the other person wants so you can match it. Then the thought kicks in: What’s wrong with me? Why am I like this? I thought I was past this already.
But what if nothing is wrong? What if that reaction is actually just a sign that your nervous system is doing what it was trained to do? It’s trying to keep you safe, based on everything you’ve been through, and everything you’ve learned about what connection has cost you in the past. And sometimes, it doesn’t realize that the person in front of you today isn’t the one who caused that pain.
That’s where the shift starts. Not by fixing the reaction, but by recognizing it. Noticing the moment your chest tightens or your voice speeds up. Noticing when you stop listening and start protecting. Noticing when you disconnect from your body and try to say the right thing instead of the real thing.
In those moments, you don’t need to run. You don’t need to perform. You don’t need to figure it all out. You just need to slow down enough to stay with yourself. That might mean taking a deep breath. Feeling your feet on the floor. Reminding yourself, “I’m safe right now.” Or asking, “What would help me feel more steady in this moment?”
That’s regulation. That’s what starts to rewire the way you date. You don’t have to get it perfect. You just have to stop abandoning yourself when things feel tender.
This is the real work. And it’s what we’ll be doing, one day at a time, inside the 30-Day Conscious Dating Challenge.
If this speaks to you, if you’re ready to stop performing, collapsing, or overthinking in dating and actually feel steady in yourself—I created something for that.
It’s called the 30-Day Conscious Dating Challenge, and it’s not about becoming more desirable. It’s about becoming more honest. You’ll receive daily emails: simple, grounded reflections and practices you can do in 5 to 10 minutes a day, to help you stop repeating the same old patterns and start showing up in dating with more confidence, clarity, and calm.
Some days will bring self-awareness. Some will give you real tools to use before, during, or after a date. Some will challenge the way you’ve been taught to show up in love and guide you back to what actually feels good in your body.
You’ll also get access to a private portal with all the content in one place. You don’t have to do this perfectly. You just have to keep showing up.
It’s $29.
30 days.
We Start June 1.
And most importantly, you’ll have a completely different relationship with yourself, and how you date, by the time we're done.
Much love and gratitude,
Iryna