When her desire feels overwhelming
“When she initiates intimacy by coming on to me, kissing and touching me, I cringe, move away, my whole body gets constricted, and instead of being turned on, I get repelled by her.”
That is what a client once told me.
He is in a relationship with what he calls an awakened, hypersexual woman. She is free in her body, expressive in her desire, and unashamed of her pleasure. And he is overwhelmed by it.
He feels pressured to satisfy a woman he describes as never satiated. And with that pressure, he loses confidence. It feels almost unmanly to him if he cannot take her into the depths of pleasure he thinks she needs.
Yes, women who are free of shame and see their s/xuality as nourishing and joyful can be powerful. To a man, that power can feel insatiable. Overwhelming. Even triggering.
But that reaction is rarely about her. It is about him. It is about the places where his own s/xuality is blocked by old, limiting beliefs living in his system. That is why it feels repelling and threatening. That is why there is an urge to dim it, cover it, tell her to tone it down.
This is part of why men objectify women. When you turn her into an object, it feels easier to handle her power. It does not seem so confronting.
So how do you shift this?
Start by recognizing that your woman is who she is. When she initiates intimacy, she is not trying to take anything from you. She is not trying to overpower you. She wants to connect. She wants to pour her love into you. She wants you to meet her and take her deeper into her own pleasure.
Then, bring awareness to your reactions. Notice the sensations, the emotions that rise up when her s/xual energy feels like too much. Get curious. Ask yourself, Why am I feeling this way? Where does this come from?
When you begin to track those reactions and inquire into them, (through breathwork, meditation, or other practices) the old beliefs start to loosen. They begin to melt away.
As they dissolve, something new opens up in you. You expand your own capacity to hold her power. You tap into your own power and energy in ways you may not have felt before.
From there, you can meet her. You can take her deeper into her pleasure, which is what she wants most. That is how you help her feel fully satiated, multi-org@smic, and touched in ways that bring her into something divine.
And in return, she will offer you a kind of love and devotion that is healing and fulfilling beyond what your mind can understand.
If this is something you are struggling with, this summer is the last window to work with me in this way before my coaching shifts into a new chapter in the fall. Through August 31, my private coaching is available at a closing rate:
A single 90-minute breakthrough session for $250 (normally $300)
A 3-session series for $750 (normally $1,000)
A 6-month deep dive for $3,000 (normally $4,000)
With devotion,
Iryna